Chapter 45

*Sorry for posting a bit late, something came up and I had to delay the chapter. 

Okay, I'm tired of getting comments on ask saying I copied a blog. My story is all planned out, gabel la asawe the blog I knew what I wanted to do. So please stop, thank you and enjoy. 

*Warning cheesy writing ahead:p*

Skinny love: It's when two people like each other, and show it but are too afraid to admit it.

Or at least that's my definition of it. 

I keep telling myself I don't need him. I don't need our late night phone calls, our cheesy pick up lines, our brother-sister bond, our endless teasing, our laughter that can make my stomach hurt and lastly the passion that we share, riding. 

But doesn't it sound too good? Sometimes too good to be true. I told myself right after I got rid of 3aziz, that I will not get involved with boys, they'll only cause trouble and drama. 

Then why did Wahab make me smile? He was drama-free, he was over protective, he actually cared about me. I basically added him to the list of 'The People That Give A Sh*t About Me' 

I got so paranoid, thinking he'd be like 3aziz since he was his friend. But he literally ended his relationship with 3aziz and the rest of his friends that were even involved with 3aziz. All for who? 

Me. 

He doesn't deserve what I said to him, and I hated myself for that. 

It's been a week and Wahab still hadn't talked to me. On the bright side he didn't delete me from bbm, or unfollowed me on twitter. I was more than happy about that. 

I collapsed on the beige sofa, sinking into it. I usually spent my Thursday nights out, or with my cousins, but I just didn't have the energy to do so. M7amad was out with his friends and Baba had training, so I was basically all alone in the house.

I flipped through the channels, until I caught a glimpse of Kim Kardashian on E! I chuckled, their reality shows are so fake, you can obviously tell they're acting. I observed Kim's skin tight dress as she walked down the red carpet. Tana7t, mu min 7alat'ha 3ad. 

My phone vibrated under my lap, before even checking I knew who it was. 

Fatma: PING!!! PING!!!

Me: Are you done?

Fatma: PING!!! PING!!!

Me: :)

Fatma: Oh ok hi:D 

Me: Hey

Fatma: Sh9ar 3la Wahab?

Me: Ma9ar shay, same thing. 

Fatma: WAAAYYYY:) Im calling you. 

Me: Laaaa mali khelg :( 

Before even sending the last message Fatma called me. 

Me: "Hmm"

Fatma: "Sara, wallah ma9adgich! 7araam gouleelah shay!"

Me: "Way Fatma entay shefahmich?"

Fatma: "I get it, 3ugub 3aziz you think khala9 touba, bes ma7aseitay eb Wahab?"

Me: "Akeed 7esait feeh Fatma! A7ba wayed, bes I can't do it. W a9lan brou7a em3a9b 3lay."

Fatma: "Kalmeeh."

Me: "Shagouul!?" 

Fatma: "It7beena wla la2? Honestly?"

Me: "Honestly, yes."

Fatma: "Then talk to him."

Me: "Madre Fatma afaker."

We hung up after endless arguments about Wahab. I've known him for a really long time now, he deserved to know why I rejected him. I clicked on the little bbm icon and typed in Wahab's name. I opened up the chat between us, the memories started pouring in. The chat was filled with laughter, unlike 3aziz, all we ever did was fight, make up, fight and then make up. 

Everytime I tried to write something I ended up erasing it. Until finally he's the one who talked. 

Wahab: Um. Shfeech?

Sh*t! Yi6la3 ina I'm typing, akeed he saw me erase and retype the messages a thousand times! -.-

Me: Sorry, madre shagoulik.

He read the message, but didn't reply. 

Me: Wahab wallah I'm sorry, after kil eli sawaita madre shloun tejara2t agoulik chithe.

Wahab: 3adi. I understand


You always do!:( 

Now what do I say?

I want to talk to him. 

No Sara you don't. Remember? No boys!

Khala9 I won't say anything, I'll just consider it as the end of a conversation. 

I laid down on the sofa, got my earphones out and hit the shuffle button. 

No, not a love song came up. But something more meaningful to me. Fix You by Coldplay. It’s old but I love it. I closed my eyes and listened to their soothing lyrics. (You have to listen to the song btw.. Click this for the amazing song!)

When you try your best but you don’t succeed. 

When you get what you want but not what you need.

When you feel so tired but you can’t sleep.

Stuck in reverse.

And the tears come streaming down your face.

When you lose something you can’t replace.

When you love someone but it goes to waste.

Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones.

And I will try to fix you. 

I decided to do it.. I care about him. This is not teenage lust. 

1 ring, 2 rings.

My heart’s beating fast.

3 rings, 4 rings.

Pick up already.

5 rings, 6 rings.

Wahab: “Aloo?” 

Me: “I love you.”