Chapter 18

La jad ma9ikhat salfat 3aziz! How the HELL did he see that picture of us?! No one was outside! 


I dropped the fork I was holding, I realized both my father and brother were staring at me with really bad expressions on their faces. 


M7amad: "Matit7achain?!" 


Me: "M7amad ma3arfa hatha, es2al Baba ba3ad. He needed directions." 


Baba: "M7amad mwareeni el9oura, ana kint bat2akad minich. Sara ana a3arfich entay binty w I trust you." 


Me: "Wallah ma3arfa." Staghferallah. I felt SO guilty about this!   


M7amad: "Mu hatha eli shifnah eb Maki?" he asked, my father turned to me again. UFF M7AMAD SHUT UP! I screamed in my head..


Me: "La2? Shdarani ana!" I tried to act as calm as I can!


M7amad still didn't calm down though, his face turned even more red.  


Me: "M7amad you don't trust me?! Ay a7ad edizlik 9oora wgoulik ana akalim it9adga?! 3yal shfaydat el trust?" I tried to sound innocent this time. 


His sharp expression softened, he looked down, "Sorry shakait feech."


No, I'm sorry. Wallah I'm sorry M7amad! 


Me: "Its okay." I smiled at him. 


I got up and went into my bedroom. A tear stung my eye, making my vision blurry. 3aziz wasn't worth lying about to my family. The two people in my life, that made it filled with joy. I sometimes believe they're the only people that actually care about me. 


I'm sorry. 


I'm so sorry. 


The feeling of guilt came back again. I'm actually thinking about telling them, to get it off my chest. 


But I'm pretty sure I'd be dead before I even had the chance to finish my sentence. 


I was so curious to know who sent that picture. 


I marched out of my room, downstairs and into my brother's duwaniya. I knocked on the door softly, "M7amad?"


M7amad: "Halla?"


I came in, "3adi as2lik su2al?"


He was sipping on chai, after he heard me say that he sighed, knowing what I'd say.


Me: "Mnu dazlik el9oura?"


He huffed, "Rfeejtich Shoug."


..
...
....
.....
.......
..........




SHOUUG???!!!!


He quickly said something before I lost it, "Bes galatle it's for your own safety, mu 3shan shay."


Yeah right, that b*tch!


Me: "Okay." I said calmly. I went up to my room again, I needed someone to talk to. This is not okay, she can't do this to me. The games are over. 


Fatma called me, just in time. 


Me: "Aloo?"


Fatma: "Um. Sara?"


Me: "Shnu? Shfeech?"


Fatma: "Chaykay bbm I sent you a picture."


Me: "Of?"


Fatma: "3ndich Shoug on bbm?"


Me: "La2."


Fatma: "Okay. The picture you're about to see is her dp." 


Me: "Um. Ok." 


Fatma: "I'm coming over."


Me: "Laish?"


Fatma: "Chithe."


Me: "Okay.." I'm so confused. 


I hung up and opened up the chat between me and Fatma, there was a picture sent to me just like she said, I clicked it. 


Oh my God. 


I threw my phone on the floor, it made a loud noise, I think I broke it. I sat on my bed sobbing. My tears turned into cries, and cries turned into yelling. 


I fell on the floor and buried my face in between my knees. 


I want to die.